One Day Holiday - Along Came Polly

*One Day Holiday is an unscheduled, published-whenever-I-feel-like-it column for Hafeez, a resident blogger for this blog. This column are centered mostly around music and random stuff that ranges from the coherent to the absolutely absurd.

Just a few days ago, I opened my long forgotten CD case (or was it called wallet?) which at one point in my life was utterly proud of it. It can hold an amazing number of 20 CDs. Sounds just as amazing as like having your romantic candlelight dinner in Pantai Dalam. Amazing it is because in those days, mp3 is still relatively a new phenomenon and buying CDs are still the way to go, for most people. In those days, my CDs are my most expensive possession.

At the time (yes, we're still in flsahback mode), 20 CDs for me was a HUGE collection. I had, among other, such rare, exotic, unknown, and possibly unwanted crap CDs from bands like A Silver Mt. Zion, Stereolab (their difficult second album), Flying Saucer Attack, and Hawkwind. The latter two I bought at a used CD shop for roughly about RM20 a piece. Which should cement its status as an unwanted crap. Anywhere I go, if possible, I would brag about how genuinely awesome my CD collection was to my mere handful collection of people whom I know who actually listens to what I say. Then iPod came about and the CD wallet was nowhere to be seen near me again for the next gajillion years. CD collection is then, now, as sexy a collection as Adibah Noor in two piece besides Marion Caunter in a rice sack.

Of the 20 CDs that is in the wallet, one CD though grabbed my attention that fateful night. It was PJ Harvey's Uh Huh Her. It was her follow-up to the amazing Stories album, released somewhere in early 21st century. I could not recall when was the last time I listened to the album, and I believe it is a very grave injustice for me for ignoring this album for such a long time because, running out of superlatives now, it simply kicks ass. When the album Stories From the City, Stories From the Sea made it into Tone's list of best album of the year 2002 (if I'm not mistaken), I was sold. I bought the album, listened to it a couple of time, and loved it very much. After that Tone was pulled out of print. Their untimely death was as surprising as a light drizzle in the afternoon.

Uh Huh Her, released in 2003, was nothing like Stories. It was raw, totally stripped bare to the bone, vicious, angry, savage, fighty, shouty, bitchy, and a good dose of awesomeness. If a men-hating feminist group somewhere wanted a soundtrack to go with their daily street protests, this is it. Just a few days ago an Iranian scientist announced that he had successfully created an artificial sperm from bit parts found in a dumpster behind the shoplots in Haarlem. Two days later, newspaper all over the world ran articles debating whether humanity ever need men again. Well, this is album is the soundtrack for that moment. (And I'm saying this without really paying attention to what Polly Jean Harvey was actually singing)

The other reason why I'm highlighting a backdated album in this column today is because it kind of makes some sense with Sonic Youth's recently released The Eternal. The both mentioned album was made for one very simple but specific purpose: to kick someone in their behind real hard, piss in their face, and say "fuck you douchebag". In these times of women's advancement in just about every field available in life, it is probably about time (and it is the best of times) for women to kick all men in their nether region, piss in their face, and say: humanity does not need your type anymore.

That is my perfect rendition of the word 'kickass awesome'.

One Day Holiday - Monotonous Timeless Rubbish

*One Day Holiday is an unscheduled, published-whenever-I-feel-like-it column for Hafeez, a resident blogger for this blog. This column are centered mostly around music and random stuff that ranges from the coherent to the absolutely absurd.



I remember there's this one time about eight or nine years ago, I read this one article in the New Straits Times in their now-long-defunct youth pullout called Youth Quake or something on the frequent use of cliches among Malaysian English speakers/users. At that time, I was quite certain that I know that I have heard of the word cliche before, but not that I was all that bothered to check the dictionary of what the Hell on Earth it actually means. But thankfully the writer had gone through the trouble of explaining what the word actually means - a frequently used word or term that has got its real meaning lost.
Fact is, I'm not very good at detecting this sort of thing because the propensity of the task of determining such occurrence is strictly reserved to full-time dedicated linguists who has a sexual life that was limited to masturbating to a MILF porn video. I imagine.
However, there is this one word that somehow grabbed my attention and it is the word timeless. We see that that word is frequently used when someone wants to describe the level of intensity of amazing quality of something, like for example a painting. A Vincent van Gogh's painting, I agree wholeheartedly, is a fine example of a timeless piece of painting. The vast amount of art that went onto the canvass was so huge it rivals the waistline of most Americans. Tchaikovsky's music is also another fine example of timeless classic. But seriously, why the use of the expression timeless? Why is it that when a very good piece of art is produced, they have to call it timeless? Is the expression the same with the one in Mastercard's TV advert that says the word priceless. Because the thing has no equal to it in terms of value? Sure, priceless seems like a fitting description.
I suspect that when someone says something is timeless, what they did not actually meant is that the thing has no equal or match in terms of time or age. No matter where you are placed in the scale of time, yesterday, today or tomorrow, that art piece is still the masterpiece. I suspect that the word timeless actually does not stand for that description because like it or not, even a very good, genuinely genius masterpiece has its expiry date. Just wait for the day when someone comes up to you and say: "Shakespeare who?"
The reason why I say so is because I have been listening to Mono's new album entitled Hymn to the Immortal Wind for the past two weeks, and I have to say this album, is a timeless classic. (And by the way, this Mono is the Japanese soft post rock band) There was not a single record that I have listened to in my entire life where my imagination goes absolutely stationary. Usually if I listen to something dreamy like Explosions in the Sky or Yndi Halda, my mind would go into space travel not quite like Star Trek. If I listen to something really dark and unsettling like Tool or Slint, my imagination would be wandering up a dark and lonely backstreet with savage unknown beings coming at me left and right while I am holding a spatula. My point is, for whatever type of music that I listen to, there is a mind trip to it. But not Mono.
I have to say, the type of music that they make is something that appeals to my highest level of sexual gratification. They are simply orgasmically interstellar. Their music is very melodic, very dramatic, heartfelt et al. I love it. But it was a bit too dramatic. It is too like watching a cheaply made Chinese voyage epic cartoon show on RTM on Sunday morning.
Even the titles to the songs are all too melodramatic. What the whole album felt like was like standing still on a vast wheatfield overlooking a huge valley while the wind blows onto your face. Sounds like a good thing; it is. But because it lacks movement. How do you like it when you're being chained permanently to a banyan tree on top of the Andes valley? Five minutes would probably be okay but permanently? What if you got hungry? What if you need to use the toilet real bad? Worse still: what if you got horny?
If you like dreamy stuff, you're going to like this album a lot. But you're definitely not going to enjoy its' complete lack of movement. After two tracks you will start to look at the clock and wonder whether time has really came to a stand still because like I said earlier, this album is a timeless classic.